Coaching Works! I've Been in Your Shoes...

It's easy for someone to say something works because it's what they do for a living.  One reason I was able to become a life coach was based on the fact that I had success in being coached myself!  I was about 23 when I met with Miriam Drake in St. Louis for coaching.  At the surface level, I wasn't sure what career I wanted to pursue.  In reality,  I knew what I wanted to do but I was just unsure about how to land the job with no direct experience.  So, she coached me through my career options and provided me with some advice and contacts to get me started.  Using the skills gained through coaching, I landed my first ad industry job in Chicago.  From there, I applied the same skills to find jobs in Manhattan and Los Angeles.  Ten years later, I can tell you that if it weren't for my successful coaching experience, I couldn't be here now saying that it's truly quicker, easier and less stressful than trying to do it all on your own.

Having a coaching practice now, being thanked by your clients week after week is truly special, but what makes it worthwhile for me is knowing my clients are creating long-term benefits and skills from our time together.

Hear Your Fear

It is common to hear people talk about what they’d like to do.  Whether it’s about finding the right job after unemployment, being able to do 20 push-ups at once, move to a new city or ending an unhealthy relationship, all of these things require a commitment.  Within each new commitment we make, we naturally have fears associated with them such as:  “There is too much competition, I am too weak, I’ll be far from my family, I don’t want to be alone.”

These are all legitimate reasons in your mind but reasoning keep you from what you want in life?  Even if you have multiple reasons, it’s likely they all stem from a similar fear within yourself.  

Fears are nasty little hinderances.  They can come from so many different places, too.  Some people may believe they come from a past life, a childhood incident or a major trauma.  Last week I finished reading, The Instinct to Heal by Dr. David Servan-Shreiber and he discussed something quite interesting that many of us don’t think about.  In our daily lives, we hear about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and many of us think this is only relevant to people who have endured a major catastrophe such as 9/11, a serious accident or witnessing some horrid event.  What he goes on to discuss, which I find to be far more interesting, is that all of us live through what he calls “small t” traumas.  These are traumas that aren’t life-threatening but do prohibit us from moving forward in life.  It’s that time you were made fun by your classmates when you got a word wrong reading aloud, a comment your parents made to you about your aptitude as an artist, a significant other who shunned your attempt at a sport, or harsh comments from a boss or co-worker, etc.  These “small t’s” hurt us.  We can read self-help books on how we should feel and deal with these issues but until we face the fears engrained in our brains from small t traumas, we will not be able to progress through our life.  These fears will hold us back.  

Hear your fears and understand the root cause of them.  I can help you do this through coaching and have been trained in very effective techniques which can help eliminate it for good!  

I'm offering a free 30-minute session for the remainder of January!  Sessions can be done by phone, video chat, or in person. Whatever is most convenient.

New Year = Now What?

Sometimes, people get lost in the holidays and don’t recover from them financially or physically until sometime in February or March!  The combination of overindulging with food and drink with family and friends leaves people feeling fat and spending more than they wanted to on gifts, holiday travel, etc. may leave many feeling broke.  Then, we add stress by making resolutions during this chaotic time instead of waiting until the chaos has passed to start fresh.  Trying to enforce progress when you are experiencing regress will not result in success.  Don’t pressure yourself to achieve all you want to accomplish this year into the first few months.  Give yourself time to catch up if you need to.  You can begin making and executing your plans but be sure not to use time as an allowance for procrastination.  This is just one area where nudge can help!

On a personal note, I like to think of the first day of spring as my New Year.  My birthday is the second day of the season which helps.  I use December and January to really set my goals for I want to do for the upcoming year and start nudging myself into the right direction.  That way, when my New Year comes along, I'm already successfully implementing many things that will help me get even closer to achieving my goals.  Realistically, New Year's resolutions should be made in October or November so that come January, you're already implementing your plan, not just starting to create it.

While You're Waiting for 2010

I’ve been hearing, “I’m so glad 2009 is going to be over” from countless individuals, both friends and strangers.  I agree, this was not the best year ever but when that clock ticks over to a new decade how much will everything really change?  Psychologically, we associate a new year with a new beginning when in actuality, we’re carrying over what we learned from the present year into the future.  If 2009 just didn’t go your way or you want to forget about it completely, take time to understand where you went wrong and how you can make it right.  Then, you can begin to take steps for using the clean slate of 2010 to your advantage.

Set a Successful Resolution Before the New Year

I have never been a big fan of New Year's Resolutions. I guess this is because most people don't keep them and I like to see people progress. In fact, 80% of resolutions aren't even followed by January 31st. "What prohibits people like me from maintaining a resolution?" you may ask. It could be a few things such as:

Your resolution is not specific. "I'm going to work out more" is not a specific goal if you're desiring to be in shape for spring break, yet you only going to start hitting the gym January 4th and spring break vacation is in March. Breaking down this resolution into a few easy steps can really keep you on track. For example: "I'm going to go to the gym at least four days a week and drink protein shakes instead of weeknight beers to get in shape for my spring break trip" is a more specific goal to set for yourself.

You're resolution isn't attainable and you know it. "I'm going to work out more" isn't attainable if you don't have a gym membership or know you're going to be working long hours the next few months, which will prohibit you from working out. You're blocking yourself from success because as you know, we're our own worst enemy. Discovering ways you can work out more regardless of your situation and uncovering your motivations for why you want to work out more can help you achieve your resolution.

Making sure your resolution is on a timeline, that your resolution can be monitored and is focused on an outcome are other keys to a successful resolution.

Nudge coaching can help you set and achieve your resolutions (and more!) throughout 2010.