How to Be an Investigator

I follow a variety of fellow Twitterers and was turned on to Byron Katie (@ByronKatie) by a friend of mine.  She has a really great quote which inspires my post today.  

“When you investigate, eventually the dam breaks, and you’re just left with open arms.”  

Now, some people are naturally more self-aware than others.  By this I mean, some people are able to see the good and bad within themselves and are able to cultivate the good and eliminate the bad.  Some people don’t see the bad within themselves so they don’t change it.  By bad, I don’t mean you’re going to murder someone or hit them.  Bad in this instance could be as simple as frequently criticizing your partner, drinking too much after work or not communicating your feelings in your relationships.   

When you begin to investigate why you do the bad things in your life, you begin to uncover some pretty strong feelings within yourself and these feelings are true to who you are.  The damn breaks when you realize that your bad behaviors have hurt those around you (or even yourself!) and you choose to change your behavior.   I see the open arms as a metaphor for forgiveness.  When you know you’ve been in the wrong, you can forgive your self and be forgiven by those you’ve hurt.  If someone chooses not to forgive you, that is their choice.  In the end, we can only be responsible for our own happiness, or own self, our own willingness to investigate, realize and forgive.